I like to think I'm relatively bright - in a round about way. I graduated with honors in high school, and I paid attention in most of my college classes. I try my best to stay up on current events, read old and new literature, and listen to talk radio. Yet why is that when I'm chatting with a friend online - someone has to inevitably throw out a word or phrase I've never seen or heard before?
Now in normal, face-to-face conversation this would present quite the dilemma. Some stuttering, stammering, a possible comment slipped in under the guise of a cough. Yet in the realm of the world wide web - I'm an instant genius! Besides the obvious www.dictionary.com - we've got Google (que music from the Hallelujah chorus by Handel - which I just looked up).
Thinking back on the early days of the Internet - WAY back when I was in high school - this would have never worked. I still remember that obnoxious, yet glorious sound of the dial up actually working after searching the available local numbers. Then your AOL homepage popped up (you scoff like YOU didn't use AOL!) and suddenly you were free to chat with the nerds you had spent all day with at school. But if anyone had thrown out an unknown word then - I would have been in deep trouble.
The key to my new found genius is all thanks to two things - the glory of high speed Internet, and the endless crap that can be found in less than 10 seconds on Google. And really, with these two tools at your fingertips, the art of appearing smarter than you actually are online is mastering one key area - timing! Back in the days of checking the speed of your dial-up connection - taking more than a minute to navigate from your chat window to another Web site for an answer...well, it would have been obvious what you were doing.
Let's be honest people - get that smirk off your face - you know you do it!
So while I continue to work on increasing my intellect, I'm rendered less than borderline intelligent without my laptop and wireless connection. At least I can rest well at night knowing I won't be woken up from a deep sleep by a call from Mensa International (and that I DIDN'T have to look up).
1 comment:
I live and die by Google, Dictionary.com, and the online Etymology dictionary. Oh, and I'll admit it; wikipedia. And most importantly, urbandictionary.com, since I don't understand most of what people who went through the Vallejo school system are saying to me.
I'm glad I'm not alone in my google dependency.
So, Lora, can you do the dishes when you get home? And don't forget to clean out the lint trap on the dryer before you put your laundry in there. Just kidding.
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